SUBJECT: National Office NZ Report January 2009

Greetings, Kia Ora koutou katoa hope this finds you all well.
Carer member Data base: 3858

 

Inaugural GRG Trust Conference, October 2009 A First for NZ.

Coinciding with Grandparents Week in October 2009, the GRG Trust is hosting its inaugural Grandparents Raising Grandchildren National Conference at the Ellerslie Convention Centre in Auckland, on Wednesday and Thursday 28th and 29th October 2009.

 

The theme of the conference is A Grandparents love, for our children, for our future. The conference will be an opportunity for you, our members, to hear from experts in family law, mental and physical health professionals, welfare, parenting and education experts. Diane Levy, a leading child psychologist and author, has committed to being a presenter at the Conference and we are working to secure Paula Bennett, Minister of Social Development, to give an opening Keynote Address.

 

The Conference will provide a forum for members, professionals, community organisations and government agencies to meet, discuss and learn from one another. Support Group Co-ordinators will also receive further training and will meet together for breakfast on Thursday. The Conference is an opportunity to celebrate you, our grandparents, and kin carers at a Gala Dinner to be held on Wednesday night will be a fun evening for all.

 

Watch this space for more information in coming newsletters! Mark your diaries now! return to top

The Rat Came Back:

The Christmas tree looked lovely with all the grandchildrens gifts under it. The cat delighted in batting the decorations and generally rummaging through the gifts. One morning we woke to find an extra gift.yes in all its dead glory lay the RAT ! Ok carefully disposed of, but the next morning it was replaced with yet another dead RAT ! All I can say is thank goodness it is only 4 days till Christmas and we are so glad we found them !

Watch for spots:

Husband had an aggressive rapidly growing Carcinoma (cancer) on his shin. He saw the surgeon on the Friday and was operated on the following Monday, and because it is in a difficult place on front of shin, he also had to

have a skin graft, only a day stay in hospital. 1 week of leg being raised with a drain in and compression bandage, District Nurses etc.

They did it under local because of his diabetes and potential complications. We had to move quickly as it is the type of cancer that can attach itself to body organs and you can die from it. Watch for spots people! It appeared from nowhere as a dry piece of skin, within 2 weeks it had become huge and would not heal. Initially it looked like a volcano with a hole it the top, then it changed rapidly. Be vigilant.

Slip, slop and slap:

How many of you realise that sun block needs to be applied 15-20 minutes before exposure to the sun. I for one did not, until I actually read the instructions on back of bottle. How often do you see people and parents popping on the sun block whilst sitting in the sun. How did I get to this stage and not know this? Pleased to hear the Cancer society are now advertising this fact on radio.

Smiles:

Q. What has a pelican got in common with the Water company?

A. They both have large bills!

 

Q. Why do bakers work so hard?

A. Because they need the dough!

Discount rate for GRG Members.

We would like to offer all GRG members contract rates, that is better than trade on everything they buy from us, just say they are a GRG or ask for Blake... www.bwherbert.co.nz is our website so they can see what we have........we are a plumbing and hardware supplier.....4 Cherry Lane, Wairau Valley, Takapuna. Auckland Phone 09 441 3129

Unclaimed Monies

The Board of Trustees of the National Provident Fund (NPF) holds money for a number of members with whom contact has been lost. This money was contributed to an NPF superannuation account and contact was lost as a result of members changing their employment and/or address and not keeping the NPF Scheme Administrator informed.

If you think some of this money may be yours please complete, in full, the form and return to the NPF Scheme Administrator at the address noted. Jacques Martin will compare the information provided with the NPF records and respond to you within 6 weeks.

To check if you have funds in this go to www.npf.co.nz find the unclaimed monies button, click on this and enter your surname in the search. You can also download a claims form from this site.

 

NPF Scheme Administrator
c/- Jacques Martin New Zealand Limited
FREEPOST 1060
PO Box 606
WELLINGTON

 

NEW ZEALAND ENQUIRIES
Call, toll-free, on 0800 0800 19

 

Suffice to say we have heard from some of our members that they were listed on this site or family members were, so it could pay to check it out. J

Quote from the singer Seal:

Children arent really yours you dont own them, whether theyre biologically yours or not. Youve been given the privilege of playing an integral part in the development of them.

ooooo00000ooooo

Auckland Members:

Greetings, Kia ora, my name is Tess Gould-Thorpe. I was fostered from birth and adopted at age six. I am a mother, stepmother and foster mother of eight adult children and grandmother of seven children, ranging in age from three to nineteen. When I was fifty-seven and my husband sixty-three, we took over guardianship of a twelve-year old girl and became parents once more. I have recently joined Grandparents raising Grandchildren and read the recommendation in the 2005 Research that free counselling should be offered to caregivers to assist with their own emotional needs.

 

I have been studying counselling at Manukau Institute of Technology for the past four years. I have a lifelong interest in children and families and prior to studying I worked for The New Zealand Intellectually Handicapped Society for seventeen years, a truly humbling experience. 

 

Professional, confidential counselling support offered free of charge to members of Grandparents raising Grandchildren and their family/whanau from February 2009 December 2009 please phone me for an appointment:

 

Phone: 535 6903

Mobile: 027 4295 484

Email: Petage@ww.co.nz

Venues: St.Lukes Community Centre, 130 Remuera Road, Remuera.

Kolmar Road, Papatoetoe. Avondale (address to be confirmed)

 

Confidentiality assured at all times

Marriage Celebrant: Lois Hudson.

I would like to offer the first 3 months of weddings booked with me and on mention of GRG, I will marry them for free but the charge of $150 I will give to the GRG Trust. The cheapest wedding celebrant is $200 this offer applies from now until April (end). Phone Lois on 634 4647 email lois.eh@ihug.co.nz

Lucky Winner:

A West Auckland grandparent Katherine P was the lucky winner of $100 worth of petrol vouchers, the vouchers were requested by a West Auckland MP and sponsored by BP. A lucky draw of all West Auckland members saw this family receive these. Safe travels folks.

GRG Members:

Over the month of December we had 26 new members join us.

National Caregiver Training Programme

February

10,17,24, 3,10 Caregiver Induction Christchurch

11,12 Understanding Maltreatment Napier

12,13 Caregiver Induction Invercargill

13,14 Caregiver Induction Timaru

13,14 Caregiver Induction Papatoetoe

13,14 Caregiver Induction Whangarei

14,15 Caregiver Induction Hamilton

17,24,3,10, Caregiver Induction Johnsonville

20,21 Caregiver Induction Takapuna

20,21 Caregiver Induction Tokoroa

20,21 Managing Behaviour Invercargill

20,21 Legal Issue Dunedin

20,21 Caregiver Induction Nelson

21,22 Caregiver Induction Palmerston North

25,26 Safe Caring Wanganui

27,28 Safe Caring Takapuna

27,28 Caregiver Induction Tauranga

27,28 Caregiver Induction Westport

27,28 Older Child Timaru

27,28 Caregiver Induction Oamaru

2,9,16,23, 30 Caregiver Induction Dunedin

5,12,19 Caregiver Induction Ashburton

6,7 Caregiver Induction New Plymouth

6,7 Understanding Maltreatment Takapuna

6,7 Managing Behaviour Papatoetoe

6,7 Caregiver Induction Rotorua

6,7 Managing Behaviour Hamilton

6,7 Understanding Maltreatment Balclutha

7,8 Caregiver Induction Masterton

11,12 Caregiver Induction Gisborne

13,14 Child Health Christchurch

13,14 Child Health Invercargill

13,14 Safe Caring Kaikohe

13,14 Caregiver Induction Blenheim

13,14 NVCI Whakatane

17,24,31 Caregiver Induction Porirua

27,28 Caregiver Induction Takapuna

30,31 Caregiver Induction Christchurch

3,4 Managing Behaviour Takapuna

3,4 Safe Caring Papatoetoe

3,4 The Older Child Whangarei

3,4 Safe Caring Tauranga

3,4 Caregiver Induction Hamilton

4,5 NVCI Masterton

7,8 Family Dynamics Gisborne

29, 6, 13 Legal Issues Nelson

30,1 Family Dynamics Christchurch

Contact to register:

Julia Caldwell

National Caregiver Training Programme

0800 227 305

Fax 04 918 9294

For the first time there is an easy read book on how NZ secondary schools actually work!

This is the time of the year when grandparents could be starting to think about making their grandchildrens transition to secondary education .

For many this is a whole new system .

What You Need to Know Before Your Child Starts Secondary School, by Debbie Knowles & Julie Mulcahy is a handbook to help caregivers understand secondary schools

 

 

Are just some of the areas covered in this handy manual packed full of tips and information.

Drop us an email on www.springboardnz.com

Available at all good book stores.

From the Ministers Desk..

I am really looking forward to working with the sector as we develop and implement the new governments social policy programme. I am under no illusions that it is going to be a challenge but I am ready and excited about the opportunities this brings

 

We all share a common goal. That is that all children are our children. We all have a role to play in keeping kids safe and getting them to see their future and how bright it can be. Recent media attention has once again brought child abuse and neglect to the minds of all New Zealanders. A change in government does not dispel the seriousness of harm to children and the need to address this in as many ways as possible. This includes addressing family violence.

 

Many of you would have participated in White Ribbon Day on 26 November. This was an opportunity to reinforce the message that society does not condone violence. I believe that we must continue to challenge the attitudes and behaviours that tolerate violence, and I was happy to be part of the Family Violence Book Launch its time we started telling these stories. This book follows on from the huge success of the second phase of the Its not Ok ads featuring men telling their personal stories.

 

This success has demonstrated the power and impact personal stories can have on the way people think about family violence and the actions they take.

 

This Government believes that more government involvement is not the solution to every social problem, and we will get behind and support community and voluntary groups that are making a real difference in our communities. After all, community organisations know what services people in their communities need. More often than not they are the people in the community that vulnerable families go to for help.

 

Where the Government asks a community group to provide a service on its behalf, we will expect to pay the full cost of delivering that service. We will ensure that the requirements on community groups in regard to ongoing monitoring are proportionate to the amount of funding they are receiving, and the extent of their responsibilities. This includes making greater use of multi-year funding arrangements. We will also investigate whether a venture capital fund for the community and voluntary sector, like those that have been set up in the United Kingdom and Australia, has merit in New Zealand.

 

I look forward to working with you on these issues in the coming years, and I wish you and your families a happy and safe Christmas period.

 

Paula is the MP for Waitakere and has lived in Auckland since 1992. She grew up in Taupo, attending Taup-nui-a-tia College. Paula raised her daughter single-handedly. She worked in hospitality, secretarial and retail roles. Realising that opportunities were limited without an education Paula went to Massey University as an adult student originally studying social work but ending up with a degree in social policy.

 

In recent years Paula has worked in human resources and recruitment with a variety of clients from banking and finance to manufacturing. Her rapid promotion saw her managing the Auckland operation before resigning to pursue a career in politics.

 

Aspiration and believing in your self with a huge dose of hard work can make anything possible she says.

 

ooo000ooo

Parents Inc Tip:

Little things come up every day that spark the curiosity of children. Children are quick to spot new things and masters of 'Let's stop everything - I've got a great idea' approach to life. Here's a way to capture that spontaneity yet also live within the constraints of our real day to day life. This plan gives the children the immediate feedback and concrete action they need and it gives you the time to plan. When something comes up - instead of responding with a quick conversation or a dismissal of the idea; act. Suggest that the idea goes into the 'Summer' jar. "Hey Mum, look at these neat windows in this book!" "Those are called stained glass windows. They have them in the big church downtown. Would you like to go and see them? Let's put the idea in the 'Summer' jar. "Look what we made at school today. It's an ABC book. Can we make one?" "This is a neat book. Should we put this idea in the 'Summer' jar?" 

How Girls Bully

Forget sugar and spice, research suggests vicious, mean, calculating and backstabbing are more applicable for too many of our girls. Psychologists call such hurtful behavior Relational Aggression or RA because the goal is to damage the victims social standing or reputation by intentionally manipulating how others view her. While boy bullies are apt to grab, shove, or punch their prey, girls are more covert isolating or excluding the victim; spreading vicious rumors; posting lies online; or creating situations to publicly humiliate her.

Cruelty Can Be Habit Forming

As young as four years old, signs of bullying can start to appear. But it is most apparent in girls at about third grade, intensifying during middle-school age. Such behavior was once seen as a rite of passage. But cruelty can become a dangerous habit. Physical aggression in older girls has increased substantially. Only 25 years ago, male juvenile assault arrests outstripped girls by ten to one, according to James Garbarinos See Jane Hit. In 2003 one in three juvenile arrests for violent crimes was a girl.

Sticks and Stones...Names Will Never Hurt Me?

Wrong! Taunts and malicious gossip are traumatizing. Studies show that relational aggression is every bit as damaging as physical abuse to a victim. Research links emotional bullying to low self-esteem, intense sadness, heightened anxiety, fear of other people, anger, eating disorders, social withdrawal and loneliness. It also effect academic performance and increases a childs risk for depression andin extreme casessuicide. Intimidation and aggression should never be taken lightly. The risks to our children, is just far too great.

Why is She Being So Mean?

Bullying can be motivated by several factors. When a girl bullies, she is often jealous or insecure. Our culture often rewards sniping and clever put-downs. And her cruel behavior may be fueling a notoriety that makes the girl bully feel popular or empowered. Many mean girls simply lack a clear sense of right and wrongfeeling no empathy for their victims. And finally, all children take their cues from media images and adults closest to them. Remember, mean girls often have even meaner mommies.

Bullying Among Girls is Not Always Obvious

Usually there is little or no physical evidence and many girls are reluctant to "tattle" on a bully. You have to know your girl. Look for a pattern of sometime- relationshipsone week someone is a friend, then hates her the next. If your girl has a marked change in temperamentirritable, lonely or depressedshe may be being bullied. Girls who rarely speak of friends and dont receive invites are, perhaps, being deliberately shut out. Is she suddenly uninterested in school or activities she once enjoyed? These are all classic signals.

What's a Mom to Do?

Take bullying seriously. Reassure your child that you will find a way to keep her safe. Ask pointed questions: What happened? Who did this? Where were you? Has it happened before? Encourage activities your child enjoys and can excel inany hobby, sport or talent will do the trick. Finally, talk to other parents. Is bullying common? Discuss your concerns with neighbors, coaches, educators and consider lobbying your PTA for action steps.

Read All About It

Be in the know about bullying in all its forms: Some books to help you help your girl: Nobody Likes Me, Everybody Hates Me, by Michele Borba; Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls, by Rachel Simmons; See Jane Hit: Why Girls Are Growing More Violent and What We Can Do About It, by James Garbarino; and Social Aggression Among Girls, by Marion Underwood. return to top

Grandmother Maggie:

Loving thoughts are coming to you. Thank you for all your efforts and hard work. She will never forget you. Amazing lady J

If I could sit on the porch with God, the first thing I would do is thank him for you.... 
Author unknown 

Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle... 
Author unknown

 

Naku noa na / Regards

Di

National Convenor and the team.

heoi ano, na

E te Atua, aroha mai..... O God shower us with love

Ka kite

 

GRG Trust Field officers

Central North Island: Alison Cuthbert Ph 09 445 9671 Cell 027 332 3868 email alnstu@actrix.co.nz

Please feel free to send this report on to others whom you think may be interested:

 

Please pass this on to other grandparents/kin carers you know of.

Disclaimer: Views expressed in this newsletter may not be the views of the GRG Trust.

GRG Trust Head Office hours are 9am-3pm daily. (We raise grandchildren too)

We are totally a voluntary organisation.

All donations to the GRG Trust are tax deductible.

Abreviations:

GRG Grandparents Raising Grandchildren

H/O Head Office

H/B Handbook

BOT Board of Trustees

CYF Child Youth & Family Services

Cos Co-ordinator/s

UCB Unsupported Child Benefit.

WINZ Work & Income NZ now DWI Department of Work & Income

Grands Grandparents

G/c grandchild/ren

Kin Kinship Carers

 

www.grg.org.nz or www.kin.org.nz or www.raisinggrandchildren.org.nz

Email office@grg.org.nz

Free Phone 0800 GRANDS or 0800 472637 (not for use for Auckland callers)

Telephone: (09) 480 6530 Fax: (09) 480 6572

Postal Add: PO Box 34 892 Birkenhead. North Shore City 0746

If you no longer wish to receive this newsletter please contact the Trust Office as this is where the total mail out membership is kept. Moved home or planning to? Be sure to let us know.